Last December, it surprised me that the final concert of Taylor Swift’s Eras Tour, which took place in Vancouver, British Columbia, caused a traffic backup in our town, which is forty miles away. I’m not sure of the details, but I was told that the US Customs and Border Protection staff did not anticipate the number of people who would want to leave the US to attend the concert in Canada. Lines form at the border crossing on Interstate 5, and when those lines get long, they back up traffic into the town of Blaine. It wasn’t a big deal for me. I didn’t go anywhere near the traffic jam. I never considered going to the concert.

I keep up with the news. I read stories from several online sources each day. I check the headlines from trusted sources. But there are aspects of popular culture that escape me. I have rarely seen the latest movies. I learn what little I do about actors and films mostly from listening to what my friends have to say about them. I’m not drawn to popular music concerts. I’m more likely to listen to classical music, blues, or jazz than I am to the latest pop stars.

I’m not much of a sports fan, either. I enjoy watching a game on television when we are visiting family or friends, but I don’t follow any of the teams and can rarely name the players on any team. I usually know which team won the Super Bowl at the time, but I don’t retain the information. I was pleased when the Chicago Cubs won the World Series, but I have to pause and think hard to remember which year it was.

So, I don’t have much of a reaction to Tuesday’s news that Travis Kelce and Taylor Swift have gotten engaged. I wish them the best. Marriage certainly has been a wonderful part of my life. Somehow, however, the proposal was big enough news that I have read a couple of articles about it. And I learned a bit of trivia that I had not previously been aware of.

I did not know that there is a “right” and “wrong” knee for kneeling when proposing. Some popular culture writers noted that the photos show Kelce kneeling with his right knee on the ground when he proposed to his fiancée. Apparently, the custom is to kneel on the left knee so the right side of the body is slightly elevated as the ring is offered by the right hand to the left hand of your partner. At least that is what I read when I did an internet search on the tradition.

I didn’t kneel when my wife and I decided to get married. My initial conversation about the subject was awkward, and I was nervous. I hadn’t purchased an engagement ring. And we’ve been happily married for 52 years. Apparently, being unaware of the traditions doesn’t affect the quality of a marriage.

During my career, I officiated at many weddings. I developed a series of routines for wedding rehearsals. For a formal wedding, a rehearsal is essential to ensure that everyone is familiar with the processional, knows their place to stand, and understands the general order of the ceremony. However, the rehearsal is a tiny part of the events of a wedding for the couple. I worked hard to conduct rehearsals within a short timeframe and to reassure participants so that they would feel less nervous during the ceremony. One piece of advice I offered to couples pertained to the exchange of rings. I’d say something like this: “You can help your partner by offering the correct finger, but if you are nervous and don’t remember, don’t worry. The marriage will be valid if the ring is placed on the wrong finger.” I told the couples that I would hand them the correct ring after the blessing, so they wouldn’t have to worry about which one to choose. I also advised them that I would place it in the palm of their hand so they wouldn’t drop it. I learned that if I put the ring in the palm of a person’s left hand, they would take it out of that palm with their right hand, and, as long as they didn’t cross their hands as they faced their partner, the ring would naturally end up on the left hand. But I didn’t take a lot of time explaining the procedure.

Rings are symbols. Kneeling is a symbol. Both symbols have roots in history and culture. Many traditions in Western Christian weddings have roots in medieval Europe. The tradition of having a “best man” and “maid of honor” comes from the culture of knights, who had squires and lady-in-waiting from royal courts. Kneeling to propose reflects the tradition of knights kneeling in deference to the authority of a king while receiving the blessing of the king. There are various traditions associated with formal weddings. When a couple told me they wanted a traditional wedding, I asked them to describe what they meant, as there are many traditions, and their idea of a traditional wedding might not align with mine. If requested, I could offer them options for a wedding processional, where the couple and their attendants could stand, as well as other details. However, I would also advise couples that they do not need to be bound by tradition. I tried to get to know the couple well enough to craft a ceremony for them that balanced their desires with the expectations of the community surrounding them and the requirements of the state and church, which are minimal.

In conclusion, I don’t care which knee Kelce used when proposing. I’m guessing Taylor doesn’t care, either. I hope the proposal was special and memorable for them. I hope their ceremony involves promises that both will work hard to keep. I hope they will be happy, even though the press, fans, and critics will surround them. And, for their sake, I hope that they find places of privacy to get away from the crowds and enjoy each other’s company. I, for one, won’t be watching their every move.